What do you think?

(Knysna Keep Website)

Love is hard to define. No wait. It is hard to choose the one you will love. Yeah that sounds about right. It is hard to choose the one you will love. Once you love someone no matter how much that person hurts you or whatever is wrong with them, the love you have for that one person will never fade. I learnt that and I am happy that I stuck on until today. I am happy with what transpired and I am grateful that I have the one I love by my side.

I met Natasha at a conference. I can’t clearly remember which one, but I remember it was organized in the city. We started talking and realized we had a lot in common. I had never talked to a girl like that in my life and I felt a very strong connection. We planned to meet the next week, but she never showed up. She called though and asked that we stop.

Needless to say I was confused. I started to worry that I had done something wrong. Maybe I said a word or did something that she didn’t like. Something in my subconscious told me she was the one. Our first meeting proved that we were meant to be together. I continued to call her daily after telling her I would not push if she didn’t feel comfortable. The problem was every time I called her I felt that we were made for each other, and I loved her intensely.

One day I called her and a child picked up. I paused a bit. Does she have a child? Maybe that’s why she doesn’t want to be with me. She maybe assumes that I would not love her daughter because she is not mine. I asked the child where Natasha was, and she told me she had left and would come back after a while. I kept my questions about the relationship between the child and Natasha to myself. I called the next day and found Natasha had come back from wherever she had gone, and we continued talking.

After a few months she called me over to her house. Well, she still lived with her parents. I figured she wanted to stay there until she was married. Her parents were nice and they kept the conversation as civil as possible. One thing I noticed was that Natasha’s mother was very uneasy. Her husband would turn to her every 5 or so minutes to calm her down and then continue talking to me. We had lunch, and that is when I raised the question about the child who had talked to me earlier. They gave me an excuse that it was a family member who had come to visit and picked up her auntie’s phone.

I was satisfied with that explanation. I did not probe further because deep inside me I was happy that Natasha did not have another man’s child. Not that I would refuse taking care of it, but I wanted Natasha to have my children, alone. Yes, I am selfish.

I continued frequenting their home, bringing gifts whenever I could. The parents were rubbing off on me as well. I was now a part of the family, and I liked it. Natasha would be mine and she would move in with me where I would take care of her for the rest of our lives.

One day during my visit I met the child who had picked up the phone earlier. She was very shy and would keep looking down to hide her face. Natasha was not around, but I felt like staying around to wait for her. It wasn’t like I had anything better to do. It was on this day that I confirmed my fears that there was something wrong. Natasha was always home every time I visited and she always left when the child was home. It didn’t add up. Moreover, when I saw the child’s face I saw a resemblance between her and Natasha. I don’t know how, but I could have sworn this child was a tiny version of Natasha, down to her smile, please do not judge me because even their perfume was the same.

Natasha’s mother caught me staring at the child and awkwardly asked me to leave and come back another day. I looked at her and she seemed more uneasy than usual. The father supported her plea for my exit. I said goodbye to them and I kid you not that child waved at me the same way Natasha did.

I have heard of family resemblance, but I think they took it too far. I know, I know, how did I know the child waved the same way Natasha did? Well, I can’t explain it. I think I was too much in love that I noticed things like that. You can say I was obsessed. I wanted to make sure Natasha was in my arms and thus I had to take note of the simple things she did.

Her absence was worrying me. It was like a pattern. She would go missing for one day, leaving her phone, and then come back the next day. During her one day absence the child was always there. To me it didn’t make much sense. Maybe she was the child? She would turn into a child for a day and then turn back to normal the next day. What do you think?